In a high school environment where a can-do, go-team attitude is important for both personal and educational success, it seems like you must say “yes” to every task, organization, club, sport, etc. that is thrust your way. Sometimes, in fact, it seems impossible to say “no.” If your teacher drops another project on your plate while you are running out the door, or when a fellow HOSA member asks if you can add just one more little event while you are elbow-deep in the latest fundraiser, it is challenging at best to refuse.

 

But while it may make you feel anxious to do so, sometimes you have to say “no” to requests—or demands—in order to keep from drowning in homework and consistently trudging through a never-ending day. After all, a complete physical and/or emotional breakdown would be bad for your productivity. Even if it has never happened to you, you have seen it in others; and you have probably felt the strain when weighed down by almost enough straws to break your back. It happens to anyone with significant responsibility who juggles multiple projects. If you learn to say “no” to people just a little bit more, you will witness a new feeling of release and relief. 

 

Getting involved is crucial. Saying "yes!" when you can is important. However, do not put everyone’s needs over your own. Do not “volunteer” to plan the school prom, or bake a cake for someone’s birthday, or do a quick review of a classmate's paper, no matter how much someone pressures you—unless you have time and it does not sacrifice excellence to projects to which you have already committed yourself.

 

There is no need to be rude about saying no. Tell the person you are fully committed right now. There is only so much time in the bank for any particular week—and there is no way to add more, so do not let someone else overdraw your account.

 

Here are a few “creative” ways to say no:

1. Offer to meet people halfway. Just tell the person, “I can’t handle this now, but if it can wait two weeks, I can look at it then.” If it is time-sensitive, you are off the hook. If not, it can wait until a slot opens in your schedule. Or magically, someone else will be found who can do it.

 

2. Ask if you can get started and finish later. If you can do a certain amount of the task but cannot get to all it, offer to do part of it. Do enough to get it started, and they might find someone else to do the rest.

 

3. Make an introduction. Tell them, “While this isn’t a good fit for me right now, here’s someone who might be able to help,” or “These resources might help you find what you’re looking for,” and direct them accordingly. 

 

4. Punt it. If people ask for your help with a task and you cannot or do not want to give it, suggest they ask someone else. 

 

Doing things well takes time. Over committing yourself may jeopardize excellence on important projects. If you are overwhelmed or you feel you are spread too thin, try some of these techniques and ensure time enough to do things right.